Mentality of a Missing-Nin
by Mouse-size-Dragon
Summary: He is a Nara, loyal to a fault, none of them had ever betrayed the Village before, but he killed their allies and ran off into the night. Now he's joining Sasuke against them and even the most stubborn of friends may have lost faith in him.
1. Part 1

**Title:** Mentality of a Missing-Nin

**Summary:** He is a Nara, loyal to a fault, none of them had ever betrayed the Village before, but he killed their allies and ran off into the night. Now he's joining Sasuke against them and even the most stubborn of friends may have lost faith in him.

**Fandom:** Naruto (manga/anime)

**Characters:** Shikamaru Nara, Choji, Ino, Tsunade, Naruto, Itachi

**Pairings:** none yet

**WARNING**: Ninjas, secrets, betrayal, killing, depression, and even more betrayal.

**Disclaimer: **Neither Naruto nor anything else worth anything belongs to me, I currently live in a freaking hut in a small town in rural Zambia, Africa, I don't even have most of what I do own.

**AN: **None of this is Betaed; I'm the only one who's edited it so sorry for any mistakes. Also all my Naruto fics are old, mostly from even before Shippuden came out in the USA, and my mother found the flash drive they're on and sent it to me thinking it was a different flash so now I'm posting them, mostly without many/any edits.

**Mentality of a Missing-Nin**

**Part 1**

Being a good leader is difficult. You have to make decisions and live with them. You've got to spend your life with your mistakes, and so does everyone you lead. A general has to live with the responsibility for his soldiers' deaths. A mayor has to live with their citizens' unhappiness. Anything that goes wrong in that town is their fault. When you're both, and your citizens are your soldiers, you're responsible for not just their homes and their lives but also their livelihoods. Sometimes you have to make the tough decisions; sometimes you have to sacrifice something for the good of the people you lead.

They both understood this, she might lead the Village but he was one of her top Advisors and Generals. Now they had a choice to make. Someone, a soldier, had to lose everything in order to save the Village. They talked, debated, planned, and in the end she could only hope he was right. It was a risk someone had to take, she was sure that any of the soldiers would do it, or try, but he knew everything in play and didn't want to risk someone else. So now she was left keeping their secret and praying she'd get her General back in one piece, one day.

Shikamaru knew the risks, knew how this kind of mission usually ended, and he still did it. _Because_ he knew the risks he knew he couldn't let anyone else make this sacrifice. If he had to condemn one person for the sake of them all it would always be himself. And this was something he knew he could do, sure he'd need to use everything he had but if anyone was going to make it out alive it would be him, or Naruto, but Naruto would never be able to do what the rest of the mission required. Still he almost shed a few tears in private when he thought about everything he was going to lose. He visited all his favourite places around the Village for the last time, had Korean BBQ with Ino and Choji, said a casual goodbye like he did every time they separated, and then left to start his mission. He thought maybe this was how Itachi Uchiha had felt. The next morning Shikamaru Nara became a missing-nin.

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**Read** and **Review** because I've got all my stories already, I don't need to post them, but if someone likes one or asks for more then I'll post more for them.


	2. Part 2

**Title:** Mentality of a Missing-Nin

**Summary:** He is a Nara, loyal to a fault, none of them had ever betrayed the Village before, but he killed their allies and ran off into the night. Now he's joining Sasuke against them and even the most stubborn of friends may have lost faith in him.

**Fandom:** Naruto (manga/anime)

**Characters:** Shikamaru Nara, Sasuke Uchiha

**Pairings:** none yet

**WARNING**: Ninjas, betrayal, killing, manipulation, death, and even more betrayal.

**Disclaimer: **Neither Naruto nor anything else worth anything belongs to me, I currently live in a freaking hut in a small town in rural Zambia, Africa, I don't even have most of what I do own.

**AN: **None of this is Betaed; I'm the only one who's edited it so sorry for any mistakes. Also all my Naruto fics are old, mostly from even before Shippuden came out in the USA, and my mother found the flash drive they're on and sent it to me thinking it was a different flash so now I'm posting them, mostly without many/any edits.

**Mentality of a Missing-Nin**

**Part 2**

When Shikamaru left he took two sets of clothes with him: the ones he wore and the ones he bought the day before and hid in the forest to change into and help throw any pursuers off his scent. Abandoning the bloody outfit in a clearing drenched in oil that would make the noses of any tracking dogs useless for twenty-four hours, sorry Kiba, he swam down river for the rest of the night. With the fast current pushing him along even while he was resting he made it farther than he could have run, even if he'd been running himself into chakra exhaustion. Aside from sending a few clones out in all directions from the clearing to further confuse anyone trying to follow him Shikamaru used all the numerous jutsu he'd learned in ANBU to disguise his trail. It must have worked well enough since he manages to go for months before anyone catches up to him.

After slaughtering the entirety of the Hidden Village of Mist's ambassador convoy and abandoning Konoha in the middle of the night, thus making enemies of both Mist and Leaf, he's been very careful to hide his tracks. Both countries are avoided like the plague, and Leaf allies like Sand, and he doesn't stay in the same area for more than a week at a time, maximum. But, two months after Shikamaru became a traitor, someone does catch-up to him.

He's wearing different clothes, dark red and brown things he bought a couple towns back to replace his typically Leaf greens and dark blues. His hair is down and he's not wearing a Shinobi headband anywhere. All his weapons are carefully concealed, as is his chakra, and all he's doing is lounging on the side of a grassy hill so he's not sure how they managed to recognise him but they did.

A Sound Shinobi appears a few feet in front of him, "You are Shikamaru Nara, ex-Shinobi of Konoha, correct?" The man half asks and half states as he holds out a scroll. "My Lord Sasuke wishes to meet with you."

"Sorry I don't take stuff from random ninjas who could be trying to kill me." Shinobi don't live long without being overly cautious. Unless Sasuke comes to him and tells him what he wants there's no way he's dealing with him. Shikamaru is not letting himself be led into a potential trap.

"He said you might say something like that and I've been told to use as much force as necessary to get you to come with me," he's unfortunately persistent and doesn't actually look anything but pleased at the prospect of being able to 'use force' on Shikamaru.

"Nothing personal but, I'm not interested in some time consuming fight right now," as he yawns to punctuate his point the Sound Nin attempts to start his attack but finds himself unable to move. Really, he shouldn't have gotten so close to a shadow manipulator Shikamaru thinks as he uses their shadows to hold a kunai and slit the man's throat. He catches the scroll before it falls to the ground and coolly wipes off the blood spatter in the grass. Turning slightly to the right he arches an eyebrow at an empty spot about fifty feet away. "You do know that as an S-class missing-nin I'd already be dead if I couldn't do something so simple as sense you, Sasuke."

Sasuke, leader of the Sound and ex-Konoha Shinobi, appears between one breath and the next. Sparing not even a glance for his dead follower the man merely stares at his old classmate. After a minute of silence and unbroken gazes he gives a respectful half-nod, "given your reputation I assumed you could."

"Ah, reputation," Shikamaru chuckles darkly. His reputation prior to two months ago was that of a powerful rising star devotedly loyal to Konoha and his friends there. He's listed as a genius and master strategist in everyone's bingo books, in more guarded records his work as an interrogator is sited as some of the best. Reputation claims that he sometimes seems to be Iruka's apprentice, what with working in the mission room handing out missions and substitute teaching when he's in town, and also advisor to the Hokage. In reality he spent more time working for and with Ibiki than he ever did with Iruka, although he was one of Tsunade's closest confidants. He knows the reputation he's managed to gather among Konoha's enemies and allies both; the man with a million plans who could practically read his opponents' minds. But now, now he's the first Nara to betray the Village, ever, and he's probably listed as a twisted psychopath too.

When he left his parting actions assured that he would be labelled a dangerous missing-nin. Shikamaru didn't just kill the entire ambassadorial party from Mist; he slaughtered most of them in their sleep and then dismembered their bodies. Needless to say when whoever found them saw the neat row of heads staring across the room at the piles of limbs, a pile of right arms, a pile of left ones, a pile for right legs, another for lefts, and a fifth pile for the rest of the body, they would never believe it the work of a sane individual. It was messy and slightly time consuming but necessary for so many reasons, most of which only he will ever know. So he's left with the reputation for being brilliant but disturbed, smart yet also sick, a well-trained and ruthless killer.

"You need something my _reputation_ says I have?" He slouches like he's bored and stretches his arms out as if offering Sasuke a free body shot. "What on earth would someone as driven as you want with little old lazy me?"

Sasuke's eyebrow twitches minutely; cold and impassive he may try to be he's always been too led by his emotions to get it completely correct, if you watch him close enough you can predict his moods easily. "By _reputation_ you are bloodthirsty, an excellent general, a good teacher, and someone who clearly hates Konoha as much as I do. Is that not enough to want to recruit you?"

"Ha!" Shikamaru can't help but laugh at that, when will people stop overestimating him? He's never been bloodthirsty. But this, this thing where everyone placates and thinks they know him, that's the reason he defected. And he's tired of all the running and hiding and fieldwork, so he lets himself rant a bit.

"Bloodthirsty, no. I was merely tired. Playing general and planning missions was fine, I'm smart enough that it wasn't too challenging, but I never wanted to keep being sent out on assignment after assignment that someone else could easily do. They could have used me to the fullest by respecting my intellect and using my mind, my strategies, but no. I was tired of being overworked in the wrong areas and underappreciated in the others, so I left. I was ignored when I warned my superiors of my suspicions regarding the Mist convoy so I used them as an example. It had to be bloody and big if I was going to avoid people trying to drag me back and convince me to re-join the Village. You want to recruit me to join your little army," he sneers. "I am no one's soldier. Not anymore."

"So you'd rather make plans? Sound does have room for a good strategist," Sasuke offers calmly but Shikamaru can see the glint of vindictive pleasure in his expression. Ever bitter against the Village that he sees as the destroyers of his family and his brother Sasuke will welcome him in merely because Konoha drove him to this.

"You are offering what exactly?" Shikamaru lets his scepticism show but underneath that a barely visible hint of hope.

"If you join me I will allow that you do not go on unnecessary missions or do things others could. You will be a general, advisor, and even a teacher. Of course there will be some initial distrust but eventually you will be a respected leader under myself." It's a pretty offer, and so very tempting.

"I want the protection of Sound and a few hours a week of uninterrupted cloud gazing. In return I will put all of my thoughts to _any_ problem you present me with." He needs the protection mostly as a precaution but if Sound found him Leaf can't be that far behind.

"Really? Clouds and protection are all you ask for in exchange for your loyalty? Even against Leaf?" Sasuke shouldn't look so surprised, clearly he's overestimating him again.

Shikamaru shrugs and offers a small grin, "All I ever wanted was to spend my days napping, watching clouds, and indulging in the occasional game of Go or Shogi. I wouldn't have even become a Shinobi if my parents hadn't wanted me to. So yes that's all I want, of course I'm assuming you will either feed and house me or give me the money to do it myself since I would be of no use to you dead or starving."

"Hn," Sasuke's cheek twitches once in a way that says he's amused but holding it in. "I agree to your terms. Join me."

The Shikamaru who was speaking and negotiating dissolves into a small, quickly absorbed, puddle. Standing from the crouched position he's been in since he felt the approach of another Shinobi Shikamaru steps out of the bush by the road that was hiding him. "Once I enter your Village, or compound, or whatever Sound is these days I won't leave until you break our agreement. I'm still a Nara, if you're loyal to me I'll be loyal to you."

Sasuke blinks and frowns, turning a little to the left to face the new position Shikamaru is in. "You will also show me how you did that."

With a slight bow Shikamaru acknowledges his new allegiance. "Certainly my Lord, I assume I'll be teaching you and the other members of Sound all I know." Pausing he lets it settle in his mind that his loyalty belongs to Sasuke Uchiha now. "Calling you Lord may take a little getting used to, since you've always just been Sasuke in the past."

Sasuke doesn't seem too shocked by Shikamaru's minor insolence. "You may call me Sasuke. It will remind us of our agreement that you are not a mere soldier." He turns and leaves.

Then, two months after he first became a missing-nin, Shikamaru Nara follows Sasuke Uchiha and joins Sound against Konoha.

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**Read** and **Review** because I've got all my stories already, I don't need to post them, but if someone likes one or asks for more then I'll post more for them.


	3. Part 3

**Title:** Mentality of a Missing-Nin

**Summary:** He is a Nara, loyal to a fault, none of them had ever betrayed the Village before, but he killed their allies and ran off into the night. Now he's joining Sasuke against them and even the most stubborn of friends may have lost faith in him.

**Fandom:** Naruto (manga/anime)

**Characters:** Shikamaru, Neji, Tsunade, Iruka, Ibiki, Anko, and random unnamed Leaf Nin

**Pairings:** none yet

**WARNING**: Ninjas, betrayal, killing, death, and even more betrayal.

**Disclaimer: **Neither Naruto nor anything else worth anything belongs to me, I currently live in a small town in rural Zambia, Africa, I don't even have most of what I do own.

**AN: **None of this is Betaed; I'm the only one who's edited it so sorry for any mistakes. Also all my Naruto fics are old, mostly from even before Shippuden came out in the USA, and my mother found the flash drive they're on and sent it to me thinking it was a different flash so now I'm posting them, mostly without many/any edits.

**Mentality of a Missing-Nin**

**Part 3**

When the emissaries from Mist don't reply to his knocking Neji, their assigned tour guide and watcher, waits since Mist isn't known for producing the most polite of nin and they already missed breakfast. But finally when waiting any longer would make the whole group late to a meeting with the Hokage he announces himself again and uses his family's technique to look through the door they've locked from the other side. When he sees no chakra webs indicating human presence on the other side he calls for back up and breaks down the door. It is immediately clear that they don't need to worry about the Mist Shinobi having snuck out to infiltrate or attack the Village, they do however have to worry about getting the bloodstains out of the floor, walls, _and _ceiling.

Nobody panics, precisely, since they are ninja after all but everyone important is called in immediately to examine the evidence and discuss what needs to be done. There is a strange sense of apprehension and confusion among the Shinobi; things like this don't happen in the heart of a Hidden Village, especially not with Anbu guarding all the entrances and possible exits of the building all night. With the Hokage and all her advisors and senior Shinobi gathered, from Ibiki and Anko to Iruka, Shikamaru's absence is quickly noticed. He is important, his thoughts and ideas highly valued especially in relation to something as strategic as avoiding a war over this seemingly senseless slaughter of potential allies under their protection. Someone is sent to his apartment to find him but in the meantime they assign the best team of ANBU Hunters to the scene to find the perpetrator.

Just when the messenger comes back with the report that Shikamaru's apartment is mysteriously empty, no weapons or personal belongings left, the Hunters decipher the chakra and scent traces. Every one of the Mist ambassadorial convoy was killed by the same Shinobi, and he left unharmed. That Shinobi was Shikamaru Nara. Nobody wants to believe it but everyone who's worked closely with him knows his unique chakra trace. Finally the Hokage says what they're all thinking and declares Shikamaru Nara a traitor to the Village.

She calls all the Shinobi together and announces it, explains what he did, and decrees that no one is to speak of this out side the room. They don't need panic among the villagers and she doesn't want their enemies getting wind of this and trying to recruit Shikamaru. The best ANBU Hunter teams have been sent after the Nara and he may have been a Jonin but he won't stand a chance against a group of ANBU. They'll catch him soon enough, preferably alive to stand trial for his crimes, so they don't need to let any of the other Hidden Villages know they have a problem. Of course everyone knows that while they might be able to keep this from the civilians their enemies at least all spy on them and it won't be long before this has hit the bingo books. It's Itachi all over again; somehow the underworld always finds out there's a new member.

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**Read** and **Review** because I've got all my stories already, I don't need to post them, but if someone likes one or asks for more then I'll post more for them.


	4. Part 4

**Title:** Mentality of a Missing-Nin

**Summary:** He is a Nara, loyal to a fault, none of them had ever betrayed the Village before, but he killed their allies and ran off into the night. Now he's joining Sasuke against them and even the most stubborn of friends may have lost faith in him.

**Fandom:** Naruto (manga/anime)

**Characters:** Shikamaru, Sasuke, and a few random unnamed Sound Nin

**Pairings:** none yet

**WARNING**: Ninjas, betrayal, training, plotting, and even more betrayal.

**Disclaimer: **Neither Naruto nor anything else worth anything belongs to me, I currently live in a small town in rural Zambia, Africa, I don't even have most of what I do own.

**AN: **None of this is Betaed; I'm the only one who's edited it so sorry for any mistakes. Also all my Naruto fics are old, mostly from even before Shippuden came out in the USA, and my mother found the flash drive they're on and sent it to me thinking it was a different flash so now I'm posting them, mostly without many/any edits.

**Mentality of a Missing-Nin**

**Part 4**

Shikamaru isn't surprised that no one seems to trust him, once a traitor always a traitor after all. It also shouldn't come as too much of a surprise that Sasuke has all his best Shinobi training Shikamaru in their specialties constantly. While he doesn't have to be good at them it will make him a better general to know exactly how his soldiers fight, their strengths and what their limits are. An added side effect of all the training is he's collapsing into bed each night completely tired out. It's a good strategy; keep him surrounded by Sound nin, busy, and exhausted until they know they can trust him. Sometimes though he can feel the scorn at how dumb everyone else is growing in the back of his mind.

Either Sasuke already trusts him or he's being underestimated again. He's been given an all access pass to the inner workings of Sound. Sure he's under supervision but he is known for being able to predict his enemy's every move after just a few minutes of observation. In the first week alone Shikamaru could point out over one hundred different ways to tear Sound apart. He doesn't, yet, he wouldn't gain anything by betraying the people keeping him safe from Leaf. But it's always good to keep a few contingency plans in mind, just in case he decides he can reach his goals some other way.

Instead he challenges Sasuke to a game of Go and shares the battle strategies he's thought of with him. He doesn't complain when Sasuke makes him waste months learning how to use chidori. While he's eventually fast enough to be successful it's useless to him without a sharingan, he'd be vulnerable to the tunnel vision phenomenon, but it's a perfect way for Sasuke to test his abilities and tire him out while not actually teaching him a useful attack. He has to at least give the other man credit for that.

They start to trust him when his battle plans work, every time. He's been in the business of Intelligence for long enough to know most of the major players in the Shinobi world and he uses all his knowledge to benefit Sound now. It's slow going, this building trust when everyone knows you're a traitor to your own people thing, but as long as Sasuke doesn't start a full scale war against Konoha he has all the time in the world. So he keeps on training and giving them advice and teaching them things he learned back home and bit by little bit he gains their trust.

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**Read** and **Review** because I've got all my stories already, I don't need to post them, but if someone likes one or asks for more then I'll post more for them.


	5. Part 5

**Title:** Mentality of a Missing-Nin

**Summary:** He is a Nara, loyal to a fault, none of them had ever betrayed the Village before, but he killed their allies and ran off into the night. Now he's joining Sasuke against them and even the most stubborn of friends may have lost faith in him.

**Fandom:** Naruto (manga/anime)

**Characters:** Shikamaru, Naruto, Choji, Ino, Lee, Neji, Kiba, Shino, Hinata, Tsunade, Ibiki, the Nara clan, and some elders

**Pairings:** none yet

**WARNING**: Ninjas, betrayal, secrets, friendship, loss, clan unity, and even more betrayal.

**Disclaimer: **Neither Naruto nor anything else worth anything belongs to me, I currently live in a small town in rural Zambia, Africa, I don't even have most of what I do own.

**AN: **None of this is Betaed; I'm the only one who's edited it so sorry for any mistakes. Also all my Naruto fics are old, mostly from even before Shippuden came out in the USA, and my mother found the flash drive they're on and sent it to me thinking it was a different flash so now I'm posting them, mostly without many/any edits.

**Mentality of a Missing-Nin**

**Part 5**

Most of the Shinobi population of Konoha is surprised when Shikamaru Nara seems to vanish. His bloody clothes were left in the middle of a clearing that was doused in oil that made scent tracking useless. Then, days later when the dogs and Inuzuka have recovered they find around twenty identical trails leading away in different directions. All of them loop around through trees and lakes and rivers and eventually they have to give up as all of the trails either vanish in a body of water or loop back around in circles. It's not the tactics that surprise them, he is known as a genius, it's the endurance he must have had to get so far in one night, then it's the way he manages to avoid detection for months when their best ANBU teams are all searching for even the slightest hint of his presence in theirs and all the surrounding nations.

Months after his defection the first news of Shikamaru's whereabouts reach an informant: Shikamaru Nara has joined Sound and now pledges his loyalty to Sasuke Uchiha. Konoha is understandably plunged into a mess of conflicting advice and plans. Some of the elders wish to take this as a declaration of war. They want to wipe out Sound as soon as they hear Shikamaru has allied against them, before he has a chance to become a truly trusted advisor and give away all their secrets.

Naruto is convinced that Shikamaru was framed. He obsesses over proving that his friend didn't kill anyone and instead was kidnapped and blamed for a crime he didn't commit. He spends weeks planning various rescue missions and even manages to get Ino, Kiba, and Lee on board with his theory. Neji, Hinata, and Shino never say a word either way about his innocence but all of them silently support their friend by punishing anyone who dares insult the Nara in front of them.

Choji knows his best friend, knows him better than anyone else on the planet. He never claims Shikamaru is innocent, because he knows he's not. He never says Shikamaru might have been coerced or kidnapped, because he knows he wasn't. All he does is check the autopsy reports, the Mist nin were killed quickly and efficiently and only dissected after death, before settling into a slightly depressed existence. Doing missions and training only takes up so much of his time, the rest he has to dwell on when he might have failed his best friend. While he still goes and sits in their favourite cloud watching spot he can't even bear the sight of barbeque potato chips anymore, sharing a bag while gazing at the sky was something they did together since they first became friends. Now he can't even accept when someone invites him to eat at the Korean BBQ place. Everything reminds him of Shikamaru, they spent years being inseparable, and only now does he realize that he lost his most precious person the minute Shikamaru became a Jonin and stopped spending all his free time with Choji.

The Nara clan almost descends into civil revolt against each other. None of them are willing to believe that one of their own betrayed Konoha, but the clan is divided into the younger half who want to go rescue Shikamaru and bring him back against the older half who believe it will be best to wait for their heir to return in his own time. Eventually it takes the decree by the head of the clan, Shikamaru's father, to stop the debates. "My son is strong, capable, and one of the most intelligent Shinobi ever to come from our clan. He can take care of himself and he will return when whatever mission he is on is complete." And that settles it, the whole clan backs Shikamaru one hundred percent, even in the face of their own comrades and friends doubting him. The Nara Clan is firm in their belief that Shikamaru is on a secret spying mission, or otherwise working in the best interests of their Hidden Village.

Tsunade eventually calls off the ANBU Hunters because even they would risk too much chasing their prey into the snake pit of Sound. Ibiki grinds his teeth and tries to look back and decipher whether or not his top interrogator showed any signs of betrayal before now. Nobody but the top ANBU Infiltration and Intelligence squad notices the disappearance of their leader, Raven, at the same time as Shikamaru defects.

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**AN: **Thank you **Ali Kun** for reviewing every single chapter and **Ndasuunye** I really enjoyed our little pm chat.

**Read** and **Review** because I've got all my stories already, I don't need to post them, but if someone likes one or asks for more then I'll post more for them.


	6. Part 6

**Title:** Mentality of a Missing-Nin

**Summary:** He is a Nara, loyal to a fault, none of them had ever betrayed the Village before, but he killed their allies and ran off into the night. Now he's joining Sasuke against them and even the most stubborn of friends may have lost faith in him.

**Fandom:** Naruto (manga/anime)

**Characters:** Shikamaru and Choji

**Pairings:** maybe vague pre-slash Choji/Shikamaru, if you squint right, if not it really just looks like Best-Bros-4-Life. (Although if you don't like slash you should leave now and forever hold you peace. Almost all my stories have at least hints of slash in them, always have, probably always will.)

**WARNING**: Ninjas, secrets, betrayal, friendship, depression, and even more betrayal.

**Disclaimer: **Neither Naruto nor anything else worth anything belongs to me, I currently live in a small town in rural Zambia, Africa, I don't even have most of what I do own.

**AN: **None of this is Betaed; I'm the only one who's edited it so sorry for any mistakes. Also all my Naruto fics are old, mostly from even before Shippuden came out in the USA, and my mother found the flash drive they're on and sent it to me thinking it was a different flash so now I'm posting them, mostly without many/any edits.

**Mentality of a Missing-Nin**

**Part 6**

_Choji,_

_You are the best friend I could have wished for and you will always be the most precious person to me. Because of that I'm asking you to leave me in the past now. Please don't try to follow me, don't try to save me from my own choices, don't become obsessed like Naruto did over Sasuke, or Sasuke over Itachi. My actions are my own. Just let me go and try to move on. Don't let my choices reflect back on you. If one day we have to meet in battle don't let our friendship stay your hand. You must treat me as any other enemy of Konoha, because I am an enemy now. I hope you can forgive me for what I've done, even if you can't forgive me don't let any bitterness over my actions poison you. You're better than that. For my part I will strive to make sure the faith you once put in me was not misplaced._

_Shikamaru_

This small scrap of paper with the familiar, barely legible, scrawl covering it became Choji's most treasured possession the day he found it folded innocently on his bedside table. That same day the ambassadors from Mist were discovered dead and Shikamaru was proclaimed a traitor and a missing-nin. It should probably bother him that Shikamaru managed to sneak into his room while he was sleeping and place something next to his head but it doesn't. As a shadow user his best friend has always been silent and able to sneak up on him. Choji knows he would never be able to beat Shikamaru in a fight, he'd never even see him coming if Shikamaru didn't want him to.

Sure he's sad his best friend is gone, even more so that he became an enemy of Konoha and a missing-nin, but that isn't the real problem for him. What keeps him angry, second-guessing himself, and depressed by turns is the fact that Shikamaru didn't trust him with his plans ahead of time. He thought Shikamaru knew, after all these years of being the most important person in his life, that Choji would always join him in a heartbeat. If his best friend had come to him and said he was planning on murdering the Hokage and everyone in the whole village and asked for Choji to join him he would have said yes. Of course he'd wonder why, he'd even ask why, and Shikamaru would've explained as he always did. Then he would've helped his best friend.

He would live for him, he would die for him, if only he was asked. There was a day, quite a few years ago now, that two little boys first met and one was kind to the other. Shikamaru was the first person that didn't make fun of the second boy. On that day Choji pledged his friendship and loyalty to Shikamaru. They used to be so close they could practically read each other's minds. Somewhere along the way these last couple years Shikamaru started keeping secrets though. Somewhere along the line he forgot that Choji cared just as much about him as he did about Choji.

It didn't matter if his best friend had betrayed the village, or if this was some sort of espionage mission. What mattered was that his best friend, his most precious person, hadn't given Choji the option of supporting him.

So Choji will wait. He will wait and one day they will meet again.

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**Read** and **Review** because I've got all my stories already, I don't need to post them, but if someone likes one or asks for more then I'll post more for them.


	7. Part 7

**Title:** Mentality of a Missing-Nin

**Summary:** He is a Nara, loyal to a fault, none of them had ever betrayed the Village before, but he killed their allies and ran off into the night. Now he's joining Sasuke against them and even the most stubborn of friends may have lost faith in him.

**Fandom:** Naruto (manga/anime)

**Characters:** Shikamaru, Tsunade, Ibiki, Konoha leaders mentioned, and a couple of OC ANBUs (but then who's to say they can't just be familiar characters behind masks)

**Pairings:** none

**WARNING**: Ninjas, secrets, betrayal, manipulation, spying, questions of loyalty, and even more betrayal.

**Disclaimer: **Neither Naruto nor anything else worth anything belongs to me, I currently live in a small town in rural Zambia, Africa, I don't even have most of what I do own.

**AN: **None of this is Betaed; I'm the only one who's edited it so sorry for any mistakes. Also all my Naruto fics are old, mostly from even before Shippuden came out in the USA, and my mother found the flash drive they're on and sent it to me thinking it was a different flash so now I'm posting them, mostly without many/any edits.

**Mentality of a Missing-Nin**

**Part 7**

"My informant in Sound tells me Sasuke asked Shikamaru to join him as a general and Shikamaru accepted." Just two and a half months after Shikamaru betrayed Leaf Tsunade brought them the first concrete news of his whereabouts. Of course no one wanted to believe that not only had a Nara snapped and betrayed the Village, surely a sign of the fast approaching end of the world, but now that same Nara was willingly offering loyalty to their enemy.

"And when exactly did you get an informant into Sound," Ibiki questions her. He is the head of the Torture and Interrogation section; he should know everything there is to know about information gathering around here. The only person who knew more was Raven, the Head of the ANBU Infiltration and Intelligence Branch. As an ANBU Raven could be anyone so there was one person in the Village who knew more than him and he doesn't even know who it is; that irks him even though the few times they've met Raven has never been anything but respectful towards him.

"A few days ago," Tsunade replies. "With Shikamaru gone rogue I had to step up our efforts to gain access to any enemy organizations that might recruit him. I sent the Head of ANBU Infiltration and Intelligence to Sound as that has been the hardest target for years. Raven succeeded just a few days ago, Shikamaru was already there."

"You sent Raven in without back-up," a soft feminine voice drifts out from behind the ANBU mask known as Moth. "This is why I have been promoted, yes? Raven was sent into Sound alone, perhaps even to be recognised by the Nara traitor. You do not believe Raven will come back from this mission."

"I can guarantee Shikamaru does not pose a threat, he has never seen Raven's face." She can feel the judgment of Moth weighing on her, that whole section of ANBU respected and trusted Raven far more than they usually would. Raven has a personal rule to never leave any Shinobi under their command behind, and never leave them stranded without a back-up plan. In the world of spy games and espionage it's rare to find someone who doesn't believe their spies are expendable once a cover is blown. That's why Raven makes such a good leader. Under Raven none of the ANBU Infiltration and Intelligence Branch have fallen into enemy hands without immediate rescue, and Raven will be the first to go in and extract someone from a seemingly impossible situation.

"No one has seen Raven's true face and known it was Raven," Moth replies calmly, Moth is more worried about the Nara recognising a random fellow Leaf Shinobi. No one except for the Hokage knows who Raven is. Even Raven's squad was unsure of something so simple as Raven's true gender, they have seen Raven complete missions under the guise of male and female both. The voice from behind the Raven mask has never quite been recognisable as anyone else in the Village and everyone knows anonymity is Raven's best asset, besides the ability to seemingly melt into the slightest of shadows and gather more information than appears possible from the situation. Moth and the rest of their branch have suspicions, all they need is an assurance from the Hokage and they will know their leader is as safe as it gets behind enemy lines.

"And Shikamaru will never be able to identify Raven to Sound, if he was I wouldn't have sent Raven on this mission." Her statement seems to appease Moth and the new ANBU Infiltration and Intelligence Branch Head steps back into the shadows and lets the rest of the gathered Shinobi voice their own grievances.

"How much do you really trust Raven? Out there surrounded by Sound, it wouldn't be that hard to become compromised," Ibiki growls, mostly because he doesn't like that Raven knows probably as much as the Hokage does about the inner workings of Konoha. Now Raven's been sent on a long-term deep cover mission into the snake pit. It's a huge security risk; if Raven loses objectivity and does something stupid like fall in love with a Sound-Nin Konoha is pretty much doomed. Their top strategist, possibly the best strategist in the world, joined Sound and with the addition of their best spy who knows more about the Village and both their enemies and allies than anyone else Sound would have all it needed to crush Leaf.

"I trust Raven's loyalty to Konoha and Raven's willingness to do anything necessary to complete this mission as much as, if not more than, anyone in this room," Tsunade tells him firmly. Briefly she considers telling him that Raven is as loyal as a Nara, a commonly used phrase throughout the Fire Nation to claim ultimate devotion to a cause, but she decides that with the first Nara in history to betray their Village having been so recently brought up it wasn't the best time.

His absence is noticeable in this gathering of Konoha's top leaders, strategists, and information gatherers. The Heads of each ANBU branch and Ibiki, along with Iruka and her other advisors the only person missing from the meeting is Shikamaru. In the last couple years when they had urgent important information and had to call a meeting like this Shikamaru had always been there, delegated to the area with her other advisors yet given a place of authority and respect as the best strategist in the whole Village. It doesn't occur to anyone but her that Raven was never visibly at these meetings like Moth is now. Moth would have heard from Raven everything significant mentioned in the meeting and never known that _Raven _never went.

Tsunade lets her gaze pass over Moth while they discuss what to do now that they have confirmation of Shikamaru joining Sound. She has no doubt now that Moth, and probably the entirety of Raven's squad, knows exactly where Raven was sitting during these meetings. The secret is no longer hers alone.

* * *

Dear Guest Carrie,

Have you reviewed one of my other stories? For some reason you're giving me a sense of déjà vu here. On the subject of finishing this, it's already done. It's Naruto which I haven't written for in years, I'm actually a bit afraid to edit it because I'm not sure I could keep the characters in character having not watched/read Naruto for years now. I just re-discovered my Naruto stuff and felt like posting it. So this was complete before I even posted the first part, I'm just spacing it out to save money, also maybe to try and get a review or two per chapter rather than posting it all at once and only getting a few reviews for the final chapter.

**Read** and **Review** because I've got all my stories already, I don't need to post them, but if someone likes one or asks for more then I'll post more for them.


	8. Part 8

**Title:** Mentality of a Missing-Nin

**Summary:** He is a Nara, loyal to a fault, none of them had ever betrayed the Village before, but he killed their allies and ran off into the night. Now he's joining Sasuke against them and even the most stubborn of friends may have lost faith in him.

**Fandom:** Naruto (manga/anime)

**Characters:** Shikamaru and Sasuke

**Pairings:** Sasuke/female!Shikamaru

**WARNING**: Ninjas, secrets, betrayal, manipulation, mpreg (sort of but not really because he's in a female body at the time), boy/boy love (sorta), boy/girl love (kind of), love, depression, and even more betrayal. (Don't worry I mostly just gloss over the whole pregnant bit.)

**Disclaimer: **Neither Naruto nor anything else worth anything belongs to me, I currently live in a small town in rural Zambia, Africa, I don't even have most of what I do own.

**AN: **None of this is Betaed; I'm the only one who's edited it so sorry for any mistakes. Also all my Naruto fics are old, mostly from even before Shippuden came out in the USA, and my mother found the flash drive they're on and sent it to me thinking it was a different flash so now I'm posting them, mostly without many/any edits.

**Mentality of a Missing-Nin**

**Part 8**

He's been with him for just over a year, making it fourteen months since he went rogue, when Sasuke calls him into a private conference and finally gets down to the issue Shikamaru always knew was coming. Sure he's still on an "I hate Konoha" kick and wants to destroy the Village, which Shikamaru usually ignores, but they're twenty now and the life expectancy of a ninja is short at best. So Sasuke lays out his problem, the reasons he doesn't want an outsider, or one of his soldiers, involved, and waits for Shikamaru to give him the answer. Closing his eyes he thinks, really he's had this planned from the beginning, he knew Sasuke would come to him with this eventually, now he just needs to re-enforce his own decision.

There's one obviously top choice so he shares a few alternatives with the other man and knows he'll have objections to each. Finally he gives him the plan he wanted to all along, knowing Sasuke will be shocked he's careful how he phrases it and with what reasons he gives. When Sasuke realizes what Shikamaru wants it to mean he actually laughs; yes it will solve all his issues _and_ Shikamaru gets to lie around doing nothing for another year. Obviously it gives them both what they want, without the complications from additional people, so he agrees, as Shikamaru knew he would. If it means they need to stay low and not attack Konoha for that year, well to Sasuke it's an unfortunate side effect and to Shikamaru it's one of the best reasons for his plan.

The jutsu he uses isn't technically forbidden; it's just a high level, complex one that needs _tons_ of chakra. He probably wouldn't have made it without Sasuke's medic-nin channelling the Uchiha's chakra into him. But he does, and now he's stuck like this for a few weeks, just to make sure it worked properly, and then around nine more months after that. That's right, Sasuke wanted to start rebuilding his clan but didn't want to have to deal with finding and convincing a strong enough Kounichi to bear his children without getting attached to him. The solution? Shikamaru uses a high level jutsu to turn himself into a woman to bear the kids and there are no real women involved. He gets to laze about and bask in the protection Sound offers without needing to do much in repayment and Sasuke won't have a second parent to deal with.

Personally Shikamaru thinks the kid(s) will end up beyond messed-up in Sasuke's care, but he's a freaking S-class missing-nin who just wants to watch clouds all day for the rest of his life so if he has to get pregnant a few times to earn that he'll deal with it and ignore the rest. At least that's how he explains it to Sasuke and the rest of the Sound Shinobi. He's still their General, he still plans their attacks and defences, he still trains many of them, but now he gets hours to himself. Lying out on a field or in a rice paddy he watches the clouds and talks softly to the birds that land near him. No one notices that at least once a week one of those birds is a raven, mostly because he's got pregnancy hormones attacking him and warping his usual laidback manner so much so that most of Sound avoids him.

Sasuke spends most of his time training and plotting, since he has to stay nearby and give Shikamaru more chakra almost every day. Babies take a lot of energy and if his gets too low his body will try to change back into its original state to recover. The added bonus of Sasuke being the chakra donor is that the baby will absorb that chakra and become even more Uchiha-like than before (as if Shikamaru was part Uchiha as well). It's not nearly as relaxing as Shikamaru hoped it might be and he notices that when he complains Sasuke's smirk is the one that says he's hiding the urge to smile or laugh. It's understandable, it is, he's been around the guy longer than he was a part of Team 7 by now _and_ he's carrying his kid.

But the understanding doesn't stop it from hurting still. Because Sasuke may be falling in love, or at least like-more-than-anyone-else, with him and he's already got hundreds of different potential plans for the future that involve him betraying the man. He never wanted any of this: all he ever wanted in life was to spend time with his best friend and watch clouds. Now he's up a river without a paddle, heck he doesn't have a boat, because he's going to betray Sasuke eventually, he can't help that, and he's already betrayed his friends in Konoha. The scenarios running through his head aren't good, he can think of everything from having to raise his kid off in some other country, in hiding, to the Village taking the Nara/Uchiha from him and then killing or imprisoning him. Those shouldn't happen but reasoning with civilians or power hungry elders is hard. Even Tsunade may not be able to help him.

Yet he keeps talking to the ravens, telling them everything and not receiving much back, again standard procedure since he is out here living with the enemy. He keeps planning for both of them, he keeps playing Shogi and Go against Sasuke, and he keeps winning, every game. His stomach gets larger and Sasuke gets softer, but only so he can tell, and he knows the time is coming soon. It's make or break, this time there will be no one to catch him, unless they've played this just right. So he sets up the battlefield and readies his pieces and sends one last message with the ravens a week before his due date. Just four days later it all comes crashing down.

* * *

**Read** and **Review** because I've got all my stories already, I don't need to post them, but if someone likes one or asks for more then I'll post more for them.


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